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“….at the minute they may as well arrive dressed in clown outfits like Roger Moore in Octopussy, after all they’d be in good company.”
Can Alan Pardew pull it off with his latest cunning plan?
Garth Crooks has massive Newcastle United surprise in Premier League team of the week
Steve Bruce v Rafa Benitez – A more accurate representation
Allan Saint-Maximin frustration as Mike Ashley fails to reward him with new Newcastle contract – Report
Watch Newcastle v West Ham Live TV – The global channel listings for Sunday
Why I can’t get excited about Allan Saint-Maximin