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As happy as a Spaniel puppy who has swallowed a box of Viagra…

7 months ago
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As a kid, my mood swings were off the scale.

One minute I would be as miserable as a Sunderland season ticket holder and the next I would be as happy as a Spaniel puppy who has swallowed a box of Viagra.

The upturn tending to coincide with Saturday nights at Rosie’s house, when her mum and dad went down to the club.

The truth is, because most of our childhood is spent in school, I spent the majority of my time with a confused vacant expression on my face.

Thinking back, this was probably due to teachers trying to educate me in physics, chemistry and trigonometry.

I mean, seriously, what the f… was all that about?

Over the years, I’m pleased to say that my understanding of the world around me has steadily improved.

Until now.

I’m back to wondering just what is going on ?

There is so much I struggle to understand, such as kids having the right to identify as a cat, or a horse, or a chimpanzee.

Having said that, a trip to Horden or Peterlee would suggest that they decided to identify their kids as primates many many years ago.

The main thing I struggle with is social media, which is a strange thing to say from a bloke who writes for a website.

I just find that social media gets used on too many occasions to portray the views of a very small number of individuals as the views of the majority.

Some over the top comments from a well oiled lad on his way out of Wetherspoons, suddenly becomes the basis for a half hour discussion on Talksport.

“Geordies not happy with Saudi ownership”

“Should Eddie Howe be replaced with a proven manager”

“Newcastle United need to spend more to compete with the big sides”

Are these the thoughts of the majority of Newcastle United fans, or of two men and a dog?

I know as much about the thinkings of the 52,000 people inside St James’ Park, as I do about the workings of a slide rule. Absolutely clueless. However, surely no right-minded person is unhappy with our current situation.

I guess The Mag helps clear the confusion to a degree, whether from the articles or in the comments section.

Apart from the odd wind up post, everyone on here is a big fan of the club, so I put a lot more credibility on what I read here, than I do on the likes of the BBC Sport website.

The problem is that we can make a judgement about a person based purely on 20 words they have written (Possibly after a few lagers).

A couple of posts and we decide whether the author is a good lad or not (***Note to self: never drink and type. It never ends well).

What I’m trying to say, is that wider social media seems to desperately want to push the narrative that the Saudi project is doomed to failure.

I just don’t believe that’s the case.

Of course, we hope the Premier League title heads our way, but should we have another season like the last, will any of you be calling for the manager’s head, or the removal of the owners?

I really hope not.

All I hope for, is that if the start to the new season sees us out of the top four and losing a couple of Champions League games, we stick with the team.

Nothing would please the media more than to be able to splash headlines about Geordie disillusion and the dream failing.

Always remember, despite whatever is written about us, Newcastle United is now a club on the up and will ultimately succeed. It’s going to happen, maybe this year, maybe next, but it’s going to happen.

And when it does, I reckon I will be even happier than when Rosie gave me my 15th birthday present.

And I can tell you, it wasn’t a bottle of Brut.

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