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Time to double down efforts after ‘Inflammatory revelation from mouth of Mike Ashley’

1 month ago

Why we much reach for our cabbages…

In light of Luke Edwards’ latest inflammatory revelation straight from the mouth of Mike Ashley, saying that any protests will be like ‘shouting into the wind,’ I believe we should double down our efforts.

Maybe he is right; singing anti-Bruce songs won’t be listened to by our obstinate owner. But even if he chooses to cover his ears, he won’t be able to avoid seeing a launched cabbage.

Previously, I’d been against in stadium protests, but with antagonising comments from Steve Bruce and Mike Ashley, I’ve gone beyond caring about affecting the team.

Bruce has already destroyed the once great defence and has turned us from having the youngest squad to having one of the oldest in two seasons, then despite having a £120m net spend has somehow managed to reduce the value of the squad and despite being gifted ASM.

The problem with chanting against Bruce or invading the pitch is twofold.

Firstly, it will make neutrals sympathetic to poor old Brucie.

Second it will give the pundits ammo to attack the unreasonable deluded Geordie faithful.

They will blame us for poor form and retrospectively attribute our protests to all of Bruce’s failings, poor transfers, poor selections, lack of tactics, poor fitness, these will all fall at our door. As Savage, Agbonlahor and Alex Bruce queue up to say: ‘See, how can he succeed with these crazy fans.’

To avoid giving Bruce’s pundit mates the chance to attack us, we must take a leaf out of Gandhi’s book and protest peacefully. This is where the cabbage comes in as a handy weapon.

If we throw a cabbage or two at Bruce, it will make it very difficult to say we are being unfair or unreasonable. If they do say that, they will find it impossible to avoid the inevitable follow-on question ‘But this also happened to him at Villa. Why does it always happen to Bruce?’

So in order to defend Bruce, they’ll have to say Villa fans are also deluded and crazy. Once you start adding in fans of his previous clubs, which pundits are happy to overlook, you have to think surely if this keeps happening to Brucie…maybe he is the problem.

Steve Bruce Cabbage

A well-aimed cabbage will leave pundits no choice but to admit it isn’t just Newcastle fans who have felt this way about Bruce. They will look ridiculous defending him.

An alternative to throwing a cabbage, would be turning up and everybody holding up a printed image of a cabbage at an agreed point. As well as bringing a cabbage to the stadium and dumping it in the car park.

And I’m sure Ghandi will approve, being a vegetarian he will be pleased to see the cabbage weaponised.


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