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Opinion

‘Newcastle United Deserve To Go Down’

4 months ago
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Another pathetic Newcastle United performance, another pathetic result and another pathetic summary from our manager in the aftermath.

I don’t usually have Amazon Prime but I took The Mag’s advice and cashed in on a free thirty day trial.

I mean, this was going to be one of our biggest games of the season. Two teams with everything to play for.

Unfortunately, they were also two teams led not by football managers, but by ignoramus Neanderthals. Two men whose idea of entertainment is leathering the ball back and forth, like a giant game of tennis between defences, with those guys known as midfielders as the net.

The only sport I’d ever want to see Big Sam and Bruce compete in is a boxing match against each other.

Despite the importance of the game, despite the fact that West Brom are second bottom and have conceded about four hundred goals at home this season, despite the fact that Fulham are snuggling up close to us and we hang tantalisingly close to the drop zone, we didn’t score or even really try to.

It was another boring game of football. Another ninety minutes of my life lost. Another step closer to the Championship. On a positive note, I can get free next day delivery and watch the Man City documentary this month!

During the match, one of the commentators said (I don’t know which one, I didn’t note it at the time and there’s no way I’m watching the game back to find out) that at the start of the season, amongst the bookies’ favourites to go down were Newcastle United, around fourth or fifth favourites after the likes of West Brom, Fulham and Aston Villa. He then said something to the effect of, ‘so despite what their fans think, they were expected to be down here.’

And this is the point isn’t it? We do expect to be down here.

We expected it last season but Bruce somehow fluked his way to a respectable points tally and finishing position.

We expected it again this season despite some decent signings to add to the relative financial splurge in the previous campaign.

We expected it when we were ten points clear of trouble and our favourite double act of Savage and Sutton were telling us how we were closer to Champions League football than the relegation zone.

Bookies need to be realistic to avoid losing lots of money. They don’t care that Steve Bruce is a nice bloke or that he’s had 20 plus years of (mediocre) experience. They care about profit and that is all. If lots of fans start betting on one team to go down, then the odds will decrease further. I wouldn’t be surprised if many neutrals, and some of our fans, that have seen us for the horror show we are, placed bets in the summer and drove the odds down.

The list of people that need the Newcastle United reality check is lengthy but the fans, or the majority at least, aren’t the ones that do.

The pundits and friendly journalists, blindly talking up Bruce’s efforts. Behaving like parents pandering to their child and telling him what a great job he’s done after only misspelling nineteen of twenty words in his schoolwork. They need a reality check and a healthy dose of professionalism. They need to adjust their expectations.

Mike Ashley, gambling on another bounce back, thinking that he can treat the football club like a third world extension of his business portfolio. He needs a reality check if he thinks the takeover will happen in the Championship, or if he thinks the current incumbent is capable of a Hughton / Benitez style rebirth.

Bruce himself needs a reality check. Coming out with the nonsense both verbally and tactically that we have to endure. I’m not going to list all of the embarrassing things he’s done and said during this shocking eighteen game run as there have been articles aplenty detailing these.

I was interested reading about the comments of neutrals on BBC Sport. Majority want to see us and Bruce relegated because of the abysmal standard of football we are serving up every week. We are the prison gruel of the Premier League.

The truth is we should be relegated. We deserve to be relegated.

The unambitious, negligent owner, the powerless and now seemingly speechless managing director, the ineffectual, infuriating, ignorant, immature and possibly insane head coach, certain players such as Shelvey who would rather play golf than reach his potential, or Joelinton who would only be worth £40 million if he was the last man alive and we desperately needed to repopulate the planet.

All of these individuals and some others deserve to go down. They are lower-level quality with lower-level ideas and attitudes and none of them deserve to be in the Premier League. Nearly every aspect of our football club deserves to go down apart from the Newcastle United fans. And we’re the ones that will suffer the most due to the combined efforts of all of those previously mentioned.

You can follow the author on Twitter @billymerlin

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