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Eric Morecambe, Thora Hird, Wayne Hemingway…We gave your boys one hell of a beating

1 month ago
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Morecambe 0 Newcastle 7 – Wednesday 23 September 7.45pm

I found out a few things on Wednesday night, including the fact that that not many famous people come from Morecambe…

I also found out that Joelinton can do it on a Wednesday night in Morecambe.

So now we need to find out whether he can do it away at Tottenham…and of course the answer is yes, well it is yes based on the one chance one goal for the Brazilian 13 months ago when Newcastle got that win over Spurs.

The problematic bit for the Brazilian were the 10 months between that first Joelinton Premier League of last season and the second and final one of the campaign against Sheffield United in June.

Nine changes but a line up which at least on paper, most Newcastle fans thought would have far too much for a Morecambe side who lost 5-0 at home on Saturday and so it proved.

It was a bit like a training game, attack against defence.

A really good attacking force on the night with some great strikes from outside the box, up against some really shocking defending.

The Morecambe first team that had lost 5-0 on Saturday, was further weakened by five changes.

This was clearly a damage limitation exercise for the home side, already prioritising their next League Two match, but there wasn’t much limiting of the damage on the night.

It was an opening half an hour when Newcastle couldn’t have done any more and a 31 minutes when Morecambe couldn’t have done any less.

Jacob Murphy and Joelinton the key men.

Murphy lured three or four defenders out to the right wing in the fifth minute, his clever ball taking them out of the game and releasing Krafth to run into the box unopposed, squaring for Almiron who shifted it to Joelinton for an easy finish.

On 20 minutes a great Murphy pass cut through a static defence, Almiron went on and rounded the keeper before taking his time, totally one-footed, to get the ball onto his left and smash it into the roof of the net.

With 27 minutes on the clock, Jacob Murphy rode a weak challenge in midfield, striding forward unopposed and curled an excellent striker left footed from 25 yards.

Four minutes later and Joelinton did much the same, cutting in from the right, he curled his right footed effort from 25 yards also beyond the keeper.

Two minutes later and a nasty late challenge from Morecambe’s Diagouraga on Sean Longstaff, saw the home side reduced to ten.

From that point on, Newcastle strolled it and surely could / would have scored ten if they’d needed to.

Instead they settled for seven and a new club record 7-0 away win, surpassing the 7-1 against Notts County in 1993 in the same competition, when Kevin Keegan’s team ran amok.

Not quite that kind of level but Newcastle did a very good job on the night, Hayden adding his own long range screamer to make it five at the break.

Foot totally off the gas in the second half, Lascelles made it six with a header, before the final seconds saw Matt Ritchie get a touch but Lavelle was credited with an own goal, though it should be Halstead in the Morecambe goal who should be credited, after his feeble effort let a weak shot go through him.

After not a single shot on target on Sunday, to three days later scoring seven.

The performance against Morecambe was as convincing as the one against Brighton was unconvincing.

Obviously a world of difference between playing a Premier League side that look as though they could be pulling something half decent together, as opposed to a League Two outfit who were probably looking for damage limitation after a 5-0 home defeat to Cambridge at the weekend.

So what are Newcastle United, flat track bullies or a team that showed they are capable of far better with the growing confidence and finishing they showed in this cup match?

Maybe just enjoy the moment for now and worry about Sunday and Tottenham when it arrives.

Stats from BBC Sport:

Morecambe 0 Newcastle 7 – Wednesday 23 September 7.45pm

Goals:

Newcastle United:

Joelinton 5, 31, Almiron 20, Murphy 27, Hayden 45+2, Lascelles 51, Lavelle 90+1 OG

Morecambe:

Diagouraga red card 33

Possession was Morecambe 24% Newcastle 76%

Total shots were Morecambe 4 Newcastle 30

Shots on target were Morecambe 1 Newcastle 11

Corners were Morecambe 2 Newcastle 6

Referee: Darren Drysdale

Newcastle United:

Gillespie, Krafth, Lascelles, Clark (Fraser 45), Yedlin, Ritchie, Hayden (Barlaser 62), Sean Longstaff, Almiron (Carroll 62), Murphy, Joelinton

Unused Subs

Darlow, Shelvey, Wilson, Hendrick

Crowd: 00,000

(Morecambe 0 Newcastle 7 – Watch official match highlights incl 7 (SEVEN) NUFC goals HERE)

(Steve Bruce “We blew them away” – Morecambe 0 Newcastle 7 – Read HERE)

(Morecambe 0 Newcastle 7 – Instant NUFC fan/writer reaction to Wednesday’s cup demolition – Read HERE)

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