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Paul Merson with amusing stunned description of Everton 2 Newcastle 2 dramatic finale

2 years ago

Paul Merson was back on Newcastle United duties on Tuesday night.

The former Arsenal player watching Everton 2 Newcastle 2 on behalf of Sky Sports.

A game where Newcastle were abysmal for almost the entire 90 minutes (and a few minutes of added time), offering absolutely nothing going forward and not a single effort on goal, making a mediocre Everton side look decent.

Then came the 94th minute.

Florian Lejeune scoring a classy overhead kick and then only seconds later slamming the ball home once again, to gain the most unlikely of points.

Asked by Jeff Stelling if he saw that coming, Paul Merson replied: ‘Seriously, I can’t believe this ended up Desmond, I really can’t.’

When substitutions were made, it was three defenders (including Lejeune) who came on: prompting Paul Merson to say: ‘Everton played well, they played well, Newcastle half wrote it off.’

In his final analysis the Sky Sports pundit declaring: ‘I can’t believe that was 2-2. I really can’t believe it.’

(***Just in case you didn’t get Merson’s cockney rhyming slang, a ‘Desmond’ is short for ‘Desmond Tutu (2-2)’, otherwise used to refer to a 2-2 degree)

Paul Merson talking to Jeff Stelling on Sky Sports:

Jeff Stelling:

“Everton 2 Newcastle 2, so Merse with a minute to go, what did you think the chances were of it finishing 2-2?”

Paul Merson:

“Zilcho, zilcho chance.

“Seriously, I can’t believe this ended up Desmond, I really can’t.

“Lejeune, who got the two goals.

“His first one is a proper good goal, an overhead kick, then the other one.

“Fair play to them.

“I tell you what I like about that last one.

“They got a free-kick on the halfway line and usually the goalkeeper takes it and everybody pushes up.

“They didn’t let the goalie take it and it was a good ball in (from Ritchie).

“Pickford went for it but it was on the angle, it come across, VAR…but I can’t believe that was 2-2.

“I really can’t believe it.

“Everton played well, they played well, Newcastle half wrote it off.

“Taking off a forward for a centre-half, Lejeune came on for Clark because he had been booked.

“For me, he won’t believe it, Ancelotti. He won’t believe it.”

Stats (Half-time ones in brackets) from BBC Sport:

Everton 2 Newcastle 2 (Everton 1 Newcastle 0) – Tuesday 21 January 7.30pm



Kean 30, Calvert-Lewin 54


Lejeune 90+4 90+5

Possession was Everton 55% (63%), Newcastle 45% (37%)

Total shots were Everton 17 (6), Newcastle 8 (2)

Shots on target were Everton 8 (4), Newcastle 2 (0)

Corners were Everton 6 (3), Newcastle 4 (2)

Crowd: 38,822

Referee: Simon Hooper

Newcastle team v Everton:

Dubravka, Hayden, Lascelles, Clark (Lejeune 70), Fernandez, Ritchie, Sean Longstaff, Matty Longstaff, Atsu (Krafth 62), Almiron, Joelinton (Schar 78)

Unused Subs

Darlow, Shelvey, Gibson, Allan

(Carlo Ancelotti reflects on Everton 2 Newcastle 2: “Steve Bruce didn’t apologise…” Read HERE)

(Everton 2 Newcastle 2 – Must watch official match highlights as NUFC score twice in last 60 seconds – Watch HERE)

(Thank goodness for Jordan Pickford and small mercies (short arms…) – Read HERE)

(Everton 2 Newcastle 2 – Instant NUFC fan/writer reaction to Tuesday’s dramatic draw – Read HERE)

(Steve Bruce reaction to Everton 2 Newcastle 2 “It just shows you shouldn’t leave a game early…” Read HERE)

(Everton 2 Newcastle 2 – Hilarious as shocking display ends with Lejeune scoring twice in last minute – read HERE)


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