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Proof Newcastle United are where they are in league due to pure luck (with dash of hard graft)

10 months ago

I ave supported Newcastle United Football Club for 25 years and never once have I felt the need to broadcast my opinions on a Newcastle match…

However, as I watched the ‘Football’  between Newcastle and Burnley (I use the word football somewhat loosely), I felt a powerful urge to go online and give my opinions on NUFC and the issues involving the football club.

I won’t bore people with humdrum blame Mike Ashley etc because I do share the same opinion as probably most of you, until he goes the club is in peril.

The performance against Burnley was by far and without exaggeration one of the worst performances I have ever seen in a black and white shirt, the thing that bothers me most is that all 11 players will bank somewhere between £25,000 – £60,000 next week for that shameful, lacklustre and down right criminality.

I’d like to give an opinion on the first team:

Martin Dubravka – I like our goalkeeper, I think his shot stopping ability is second to none and let’s be honest we wouldn’t be in 11th place if it wasn’t for him. (Keep)

Javier Manquillo – Javier Manquillo for me brings so little in terms of quality, attacking and overall ability, I sometimes wonder how he made it to a professional level and the fact he played for Sunderland dampens my opinion further. (Get rid)

Paul Dummett – For me, Paul Dummett brings a level of frustration that I sometimes fail to keep to myself, I quite often want to hoof the telly off the wall after watching him play. Inconsistent, clueless and his only passion lies in how far he can kick the ball up the pitch to see if he can better the previous weeks effort, having said that I’ve seen him be by far our best defender on occasion. (Keep)

Fabian Schar – Its no secret Fabian Schar is a fans favourite, he happens to be one of mine. A natural talent that looks comfortable on and off the ball and if he’s not crashing through an incoming attacker he is demonstrating how well he can fly, by clearing the ball just as it’s about to cross the line. (Keep)

Federico Fernandez – Strong, powerful and pops up in the right place every now and again, a defender you can rely on for sure, very impressive and a definite. (Keep).

Jetro Willems – A talented footballer, a real good spot by whichever scout it was that said ‘aye he can probably dee a job for us’, bring him in on loan and then at the end of the season once he’s established as a hero, Mr Ashley will swing the axe and smash any intention of signing him permanently miles out of St James Park. (Keep) (If we could)

Ciaran Clark – I like Ciaran Clark, I think he’s always ready for the challenge and always does a job when called upon, nothing more to say than that if I’m honest. (Keep)

Jamaal Lascelles – Our captain and a great one at that. England quality and an all round good bloke, apart from he’s never got any cash on him, would be no good in the pub for rounds, on the pitch he’s much needed and missed when he’s not. (Keep)

Christian Atsu – A player of real rank average ability, tries to go forward granted, however he hasn’t mastered the art of of taking the ball with him and watching him try to skin a defender is embarrassing. (Get rid)

Sean Longstaff – A homegrown talent born in our very own North Tyneside, young, hungry and a fantastic ability to give the ball away today against Burnley. I saw him hoof the ball as high as he could in such a way that said ‘do ya kna what? I can’t be fu..ed with this today like’, he is not the talent he’s made out be and performance today, I personally wouldn’t pay him for. However, there’s still time for him (Keep) but if Man Utd come back in with 50 Mil though….

(The Longstaff brothers gave us hope of a home grown centre midfield in their display against Man Utd. However, I just don’t think they will hit the heights and will be forgotten about in years to come, it was Matty’s blistering debut effort that fooled us all I’m afraid. I hope I am completely wrong.)

Jonjo Shelvey – At 27  has never really scaled the heights that I think he’s capable of, can be frustrating at times and had to work very hard to keep that temper at bay, in fine form recently and a big miss in the middle of the park. (Keep)

Miguel Almiron – Miggy, Miggy, Miggy, where to start with Miggy? Talented, quick, bundles of energy with an ability to dive like Tom Daley, must utilise his abilities better and I do think he will come good in the end but he’s running out of time. (Keep)

Allan Saint-Maximin – Breath of fresh air, lightning quick, dangerous and dribbles like Messi! Huge miss and can’t believe he got injured doing 38km an hour! Need him back ASAP. (Keep)

Yoshinori Muto – If Yoshinori Muto left the club tomorrow with immediate effect, I don’t think anybody would either care or notice. (Get rid)

Joelinton – How can I put this…? Joelinton is one of, if not the, worst player I have ever seen wear the number 9 shirt for Newcastle United. Now I understand the ‘give him time’ approach and the ‘well he’s getting no service’ argument, yes granted he’s not receiving much.. However, for somebody who cost £40M and who scored 7 goals for the mighty Hoffenheim I would expect better. Did he look better today on the left? Yes, I have to concede he did, however he looked nothing like £40M, not even close, all round movement was poor and always is to be honest. Yes he wins things in the air but we already have Big Andy to do that and so far the whole transfer looks a shocking, very peculiar quickfire panic investment on a player who can’t do the basics, just to shut us up about smashing club record. (Get rid)

Andy Carroll – Carroll was my favourite player when he left us for Liverpool, I was gutted! I remember very well, can’t blame the lad, big club comes in, huge pay packet on offer, off he went. Failed there and moved to West Ham because the players complained that the bench was too cold and big Andy was needed to heat it every week, after a long period of time he comes back to the club he never should have left. Andy Carroll is on par, if not better than the mighty ‘Wor Alan’ in the air, he came on against Southampton and changed the game and showing Joelinton how its done in the process. Keeping him fit is the main problem and pay as you play is the right thing for him I feel, I’m very pleased he’s back because I think he’s all round quality. (Keep)

Dwight Gayle – The best Championship striker there is no doubt, all clubs want him because he can fire you straight back to the big time! However, put him in the PL and he’s not good enough and misses glorious opportunities like the one we all witnessed today. (Get Rid)

It’s no secret we struggled today partly because of injuries yes… that is an excuse up to a point we will buy off Mr Bruce for today’s horrific, gutless, spineless, lazy effort. However, today for me was like watching a nightmare and left me in total disbelief at what I was watching.

It’s nothing but pure luck mixed with a dash of hard graft, that we are where we are today in the league, make no mistake we will not stay there.

Never written anything like this before but just had to after that.

Toon Toon! Keep the faith lads.


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