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Monday Newcastle United Takeover update ‘exclusive’ is laughable

1 month ago
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A Newcastle United Takeover ‘exclusive’ on Monday.

Or should I say, yet another Newcastle United Takoever ‘exclusive’ goes out.

Like the rest of you, I am desperate to see the back of Mike Ashley.

However, the coverage of this latest alleged Newcastle United Takeover gets ever more desperate, especially in the local media.

It all stems from the now infamous 46 page brochure that went public last month, sent out to potential investors by GACP Sports and Peter Kenyon.

A brochure written in crayon and proclaiming Steve Bruce as having unparalleled success in Europe, so many of the other ‘facts’ in the brochure also apparently plucked from the Donald Trump book of truth.

To their credit, the media have done a sterling/desperate job in trying to keep this feeble story going.

Even if you actually believed this was a genuine bid to buy Newcastle United, you are supposed to believe that they are going to buy the club in the middle of a relegation battle even though they can only afford less than half the purchase price up front and could find their new business worth less than half the purchase price within a few months if NUFC were relegated.

That is if you believe this is in any way a genuine attempt to buy the football club.

The latest ‘exclusive(s)’ are the setting up of legal entities/companies that will supposedly be vehicles used to then buy the club etc.

You have to laugh.

It costs a pittance to do this type of thing and the companies set up have ‘Newcastle Investors’, ‘Newcastle Management’ and ‘Newcastle Partners’ in their names, yes that sounds very believable.

It simply smacks of a desperate attempt to get cheap publicity, if they were in any way serious they could go about this in a totally anonymous way, by simply giving the companies random names or even just a number.

What next, a company name registered as…’Please give us a tenner and we will buy the Toon, Howay the lads, Newcastle United whey aye man’?

At the very best, this is some kind of desperate attempt by Peter Kenyon and friends to try and find some investors.

As that is another thing, just like the Amanda Staveley ‘bid’ or previous Peter Kenyon ‘bid’, with this one, so many in the media make out that it they (Peter Kenyon and GACP Sports) who would be putting the money up, or a large part of it, to buy Newcastle United.

The reality is that just like Amanda Staveley and Peter Kenyon’s previous one, this ‘bid’ if you really believe in it (a bit like believing you might win the lottery…), would see other people putting the vast majority of the money up, or all of it, then the likes of GACP and Kenyon fronting the bid and/or managing the asset (football club) after a buyout.

I don’t know how genuine or not the supposed BZG attempted takeover of NUFC was but at least the story with that one was that potentially the people named in that takeover tale could/would have potentially had the necessary funds themselves to buy Newcastle United.

In the Shields Gazette ‘exclusive’ below, they talk of it showing Kenyon and friends ‘continuing to press on with their plans’ to buy Newcastle United.

That will be like me pressing on with my plans to marry Scarlett Johansson…

The Shields Gazette ‘Exclusive’:

‘The Gazette can reveal that DaGrosa’s US investment firm – who are working with former Manchester United and Chelsea chief Peter Kenyon – have within the last seven days progressed their bid by opening a fresh company GACP NEWCASTLE INVESTORS (U.S.), LLC out of Delaware. The incorporation date for this fresh venture was Tuesday, October 8.

This follows on from the setting up of GACP NEWCASTLE MANAGEMENT (U.S) LLC and GACP NEWCASTLE PARTNERS (U.S), LLC. The former launched on September 27, 2019 with the latter set-up on October 1, 2019.

Further to this ‘Newcastle Investors Ltd’ has been registered in the Cayman Islands, as well as ‘Newcastle Investors Ltd’ company name reserved on the Isle of Jersey company register.

This marks the next step in the group’s Newcastle United bid – as outlined in their 46-page brochure circulated to press last month.

As stated on page 35 of the brochure ‘GACP Newcastle Investors Ltd (Isle of Jersey Company)’ would be the vehicle used to bring investment into the model from outside the of the U.S.

‘GACP Newcastle Investors Ltd (Cayman Limited Company)’ is to be used for investment from America.’

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