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Crisis what Crisis? Sorry Jinky Junior but it comes to us all in the end

1 year ago

When I was a young man, there was an album by the pistols called ‘Never mind the bo..ocks’, there also was an album by Supertramp, who for those of you who don’t know, were a bunch of long haired hippies, their album was called ‘Crisis what Crisis?’

If you were cool, hard and edgy you would have bought one of those.

If you were not cool hard or edgy then you would have bought the other.

Guess which one I had in my record collection, stored alphabetically in a box next to a music system that was the size of a small child.

Anyway, the two album titles came to mind last weekend as we were being turned over in Norfolk.

Newcastle United have lost two games of football. Crisis what Crisis?

After all, in what was my favourite season ever, 1993-94, Kevin’s team lost their first two, but we finished third.

Even Bobby’s team of 2003-04 didn’t win any of the first six but we finished fifth.

So, I ask again, Crisis what Crisis?

Except this isn’t 1993 or 2003. Even those fans who have a moonie-like devotion to the club have to accept that this team are heading for the bottom five, not the top five.

Therefore if you are a Newcastle fan, is the only option you can take, to say ‘Never mind the bo..ocks’, lets support the team.

After all being a football fan has always been 90% pain and 10 % joy. And that’s if you are lucky.

If football fans only turned up when their club were successful, then seeing as Man City won all three trophies last season, we should be looking at a hell of a lot of empty stadiums.

But that’s not how it works.

You may laugh at their plight but look at Sunderland, 30,000 still going in division three. Surely that is very impressive or are they just 30,000 sheep who deserve everything they endure?

Look at Bolton, 5,000 turning up to watch a bunch of kids abducted off the street to play for their club, which is basically wrecked. Is this a wonderful display of loyalty to their football club, or are they a bunch of idiots?

What about Hartlepool? There were 3,000 turning up to watch conference football against Solihull Moors and Borehamwood. Now that is real support, or is there just nowt else to do in Hartlepool?

What I am trying to say is there is no logic in being a football fan. None whatsoever. I guess if it’s what you do, then that’s what you do. A few people calling you apologists or sheep on a website will not change that.

There was a time I would have been among the angry men. Many years ago, Newcastle was the most important thing in my life. I was a banner waving militant trying to move on McKeag. I was obsessed with his removal.

Anyone who said good morning to me would be answered by…”What is good about it? SACK THE BOARD. ”

But I’m thirty years older and do not have the desire for the fight anymore.

Does that make me an apologist? It is of no importance. This fight isn’t mine. It only belongs to those who are regularly attending matches today. No one else matters. Only those who hand over money and there are still 40,000 of them

I know that statement is a red rag to some of you but the likes of me who gave up their season ticket no longer count. My opinion is no more important or any more relevant than my 85 year old uncle, who was a huge fan in the 1960s but hasn’t set foot in St James since 1988.

He is entitled to his thoughts but they aren’t exactly going to bother Mike Ashley.

Screaming abuse at people on here is not going to make the slightest difference. In fact, I worry that the only thing it’s likely to get you in the next few years is a knock on the door from the thought police.

Think I’m joking? Did you read about the kid who wrote on one of her A Level papers that she hated the practice of the halal slaughter of Animals. They initially scrapped her paper and she was reported for hate speech. The thing was, she was simply expressing her feelings as a 16-year-old vegetarian, but these days we all need to be very careful what we write and how we write it.

I contacted everyone I know who turned up against Arsenal to ask them the question. Now granted, that is only nine people, but the overriding response was: “This is what I do with my mates and while I still enjoy the day I will continue to do it.”

More than once, the comment was “seen it all before. ”

And I believe that sums up the situation in a couple of sentences.

Never mind the bo..ocks. We support Newcastle United.

I have tried to write this article that sees both sides of the argument but as all of us have our own NUFC history, all of us have our own agenda which will come through in the writing.

The truth is, we aren’t going to win anything under this ownership and as I am 60, I am desperate to see this club win something quickly, because I am running out of seasons. Sadly, I don’t hold out much hope, however, believe me when I say it is not the most important thing in life. Nowhere near it.

Jim White isn’t on Talksport today. There is a God. Natalie Sawyer is on instead. She is speaking about the loss people feel when a family member who people have attended matches with for years has died and how many now can’t face walking into the stadium again.

For once Talksport is listenable.

So let’s try to keep a sense of perspective. This is not Hong Kong. This is not about bringing down a government. Whether Newcastle win or lose, the interest rate on your mortgage will not change.

We are talking about a bunch of Millionaires dressed in short pants, kicking a bag of air into a big fishing net.

Yes, it is addictive. Yes, it is enjoyable (sometimes) but in the end, in the great scheme of things, it’s just a game of football.

If my 30 year old self could hear me say that, his head would explode.

How on earth is football not more important than family, health, or financial security in retirement???

Sorry Jinky Junior but it comes to us all in the end.


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