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John Carver’s linkedin profile is comedy gold

6 years ago

The John Carver management period at Newcastle United was short but memorable.

Not so much for the results but more so the increasingly bizarre comments made by Alan Pardew’s former assistant.

Alan Pardew was a hard act to follow in terms of outrageous comments and stretching the truth but John Carver gave it a great go.

When it came to the actual performances and results on the pitch, it was simply a repeat of the worst of Pardew, rather than any new golden era.

Even though he had the top job less than five months, John Carver managed to almost relegate Newcastle United from what had seemed a safe as houses 9th in the table when he took over, as well as doing something that had never before happened in 123 years of NUFC history.

Yes, John Carver lost eight league games in a row, a new record for the club.

However, we now give you John Carver’s linkedin profile.

For those of you who don’t know, linkedin is a business orientated social networking service where many of the users advertise the talents to potential employers…

John Carver linkedin profile (Highlights)


I am a forward thinking football manager, highly skilled coach and focused leader with over 30 years experience’ in the game. I have managed or coached in 675 professional games in English and European competition, learning under exceptional managers such as Sir Bobby Robson and gaining direct experience in the field as the First Team Manager / Head Coach of Newcastle United FC and Toronto FC.

I am able to provide tangible contributions to an ambitious club in either a managerial capacity or a more supporting role, where my commitment to continuous player development, strategic team building, intelligent talent ID and innovative sports science & performance analysis can allow me to be a driving force behind club progression.


Newcastle United FC

First Team Manager

Newcastle United FC

2014 – 2015 (1 year)

I was appointed Caretaker Manager and then First Team Manager following the departure of Alan Pardew to Crystal Palace, inheriting an underperforming squad that had lost 4 of its last 7 games. The club was also experiencing a well-publicised and still ongoing period of turbulence involving the current ownership that saw fans frequently protesting at St James’ Park.

Within this difficult environment I was able to secure the club’s Premier League status with a 2-0 win over West Ham United on the last day of the season, finishing 15th in the league and ahead of local rivals Sunderland.

Newcastle United FC

Assistant Manager

Newcastle United FC

2011 – 2015 (4 years)

I returned to Newcastle in January 2011 under new First Team Manager Alan Pardew to help stabilise the club in the middle of an inconsistent season. Notable achievements include:

  • Finishing the 2011/12 season in 5th place ahead of Chelsea, Everton and Liverpool
  • Qualifying for the UEFA Europa League
  • Recording notable victories over Manchester United, Chelsea and Liverpool
  • Reaching the UEFA Europa League quarter-finals in 2012 to face eventual runners-up SL Benfica
  • Helping the club reach the League Cup quarter-finals in 2014/15 against Tottenham Hotspur




Youth Development

Man Management

Strategic Planning

Talent Scouting


Media Relations


Team Leadership

Team Management


Performance Management

Performance Improvement

Player Development

Customer Service


Microsoft Excel

Microsoft Office

Microsoft Word


Public Speaking


Social Media


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