Get your daily update and weekly newsletter by signing up today!


Laughable Premier League predictions from Stan Collymore

5 years ago

Stan Collymore has made his Premier League predictions for the coming season and to say they are laughable is a sizeable understatement.

The player turned pundit predicts Newcastle to finish 15th but it’s not that which I find annoying/laughable.

Collymore has Sunderland to just avoid relegation in 16th spot but it’s not that which I find disappointing/laughable.

Nor is it that he has Chelsea to win the league.

Have a look at his predictions below and have a think – explanation then below.

What is laughable about it all is that Stan Collymore has approached it with all the enthusiasm of a teenager with homework that he can’t be bothered with.

How to do it as quickly as possible and with as little thought, leave half in the same place as last time and move the rest around one oor two places.

He has all three promoted teams to be relegated which is just an easy cop-out, with two relegated last time and a third (Leicester) only surviving because of a dramatic late run.

Elsewhere, Stan has the top four exactly the same as last season.

Last year’s four teams that finished between fifth and eighth are all once again in that category but have been moved one or two places.

The teams who finished 9th to 12th are all in that same category again but have been moved up or down two spots.

Then exactly like a schoolkid, the only team to move up by more than two places is the one he supports – Villa up four spots despite losing their best two players!

Leicester are the token team to drop more than two places, though even they don’t do anything dramatic like getting relegated.

The 20 clubs and how many positions they have changed from last season:

Chelsea – Same

Man City – Same

Arsenal – Same

Man Utd – Same

Liverpool – Up 1

Swansea – Up 2

Tottenham – Down 2

Southampton – Down 1

Everton – Up 2

West Ham – Up 2

Stoke –  Down 2

Crystal Palace – Down 2

Villa – Up 4

West Brom – Down 1

Newcastle – Same

Sunderland – Same

Leicester – Down 3

Norwich –

Bournemouth –

Watford –


If you would like to feature on The Mag, submit your article to [email protected]

Have your say

© 2020 The Mag. All Rights Reserved. Design & Build by Mediaworks