That phrase, ‘moving in mysterious ways’, is surely a perfect description for Newcastle United under Mike Ashley.

Thursday night saw Newcastle fans receiving an email (see below) from the club with Steve McClaren’s name attached to it, ‘revealing’ Newcastle United’s backroom team.

Whilst it is some relief that at long last the club have confirmed coaching staff have been signed up, it does lose a little impact when the announcement comes AFTER pre season training has begun and a week after the names appeared in the press as having been pulled ‘over the line’.

Just in case you missed it; Ian Cathro is McClaren’s assistant manager, Paul Simpson is first team coach, whilst Alessandro Schoenmaker is fitness coach and Steve Black a consultant. Andy Woodman retained as goalkeeping coach.

It appears clear that this email is another attempt to make season ticket holders/members feel a little bit special and the email says that further ones will follow, including at least another before the squad depart for America next weekend.

It isn’t difficult to read between the lines and assume that this is clearly to get the message out of ‘working hard behind the scenes, plenty of time to sign the ‘right’ players’, not like those other daft Premier League clubs who have already bought around fifty players between them this summer.

Steve McClaren’s name is attached to this message much as Joe Kinnear with ‘his’ infamous programme notes.

mike ashley

When supposedly Director of Football at Newcastle, a number of articles appeared in matchday programmes under JFK’s name, explaining football finance and FFP (Financial Fair Play), which was all basically just nonsense to justify not buying credible/any players.

The club later admitting that of course the programme articles hadn’t been written by Kinnear, though they did bizarrely claim that he had played a part in their preparation – presumably passing the crayons over.

Nothing wrong with this form of communication but once again you just feel that they are trying too hard to make it look as though they are bothered about the supporters and look for PR gimmicks to back that up.

Rather than Mike Ashley just getting on with the job of putting proper investment into the squad and his minions going out and signing them up.

It may be an old fashioned view but I quite liked it when the likes of Kevin Keegan or Sir Bobby Robson picked out decent players and the club bought them, then KK or SBR held a press conference answering questions alongside the new arrival.

That may sound a bit radical but just a thought.

The email from…Steve McClaren:

mike ashleymike ashley

I can’t wait for the next one telling us who Newcastle have bought!

  • LeazesEnder

    The one line that sticks out for me…. ‘it isn’t a quick fix’ …. 

    Charnley didn’t think it was broken in the first place!

    Nah mate we’ve only been waiting since 1969 and we’ve had that statement every year since…

  • BillytheFish

    Wouldn’t it be great if they revealed all their exclusive news and transfer dealings to the supporters via email first…..Interesting.

  • Andgeo

    £50m “INVESTED” on two proper centre forwards and two proper central defenders sounds like a quick fix to me! We know where the problem is, and how to fix it. But this requires spending some of the clubs money. What they are saying is that this investment will not be made!
    We knew this already!!!

  • Heaton Mick

    Has anybody else got this e-mail in their inbox?
    I’m a glutton for punishment and still have a season ticket (mainly because I wasn’t organised enough to cancel the direct debit!) and haven’t got this e-mail.
    Has it only gone to non-renewers in a pathetic hope at getting people to sign up?

  • NottsToon

    I predict right now a net spend of less than £20m this summer and a raft of crap excuses.
    My second prediction is that the entirety of next season will be a relegation battle. The owner never had any intention of strengthening the squad, surprisingly it was all about getting more money into his greedy pockets.

  • ncncnc

    Heaton Mick
    no, i got mine

  • Toonbadger

    More of the same and if you believe it then I feel sorry for you. When will you ever learn that this is the way it`s been for years and things will never change. Yes he “may” bring in a couple of players but what about January 2016 and end of next season? He has been found out to lie through his mankey back teeth(Keegan court case) and is doing exactly that now. As I say it`s up to you to believe his BS or not.

  • Selbini

    I’m in the same boat Heaton Mick, still a season ticket holder (last year for me) and no email !
    How in-special do I feel ?

  • Oldgit

    Seven e’mails clan be miss-read. Simpson is also an assistant coach. Not a first team coach. Please get your facts right.

  • Oldgit

    Noticed the usual moaners on this site. I have a lot more faith in these coaches than the carvers and stone of this world. Ok I have to wipe off the last 8 years of demise and have to look forward. Only time will tell if we kick off with some decent players coming in.
    People complained, me included, about the lack of communication, at least it’s a start. Although to be honest I can now see the end of the post matches interviews to the press as they may ask some awkward questions.

  • foggy

    Maybe someone who has received this e-mail can be good  enough to publish the e-mail address it came from so that all of us can reply.
    We can then forward all of our spam to that address, because this mail from McClaren(?) is just PR Spam from one of Fat Ashes minions.
    Once again the fans are being led down the garden path.

  • Jezza_NUFC

    NottsToon  I’ll be surprised if there’s going to be any net spend this summer. If there is any transfer budget it’ll be around 50% to 70% of what they bring in from selling one or more of our “purples”. If they don’t sell anybody there’ll be no new signings at all.

  • JohnyH

    Another transparent attempt at moving season tickets by this shower of sh..te
    They must think we’re all thick

  • Demented_Man

    NottsToon Of course a net spend of less than £20m clearly includes the amount 1p.  This would be enough to ensure that Penfold doesn’t break his promise.

  • toon tony

    Towards the end of last season, we had all and sundry saying “WE HAVE LEARNED FROM THIS SEASON. WE WON’T BE MAKING THE SAME MISTAKES , WE KNOW WHAT WE HAVE TO DO. Now we’re are told we won’t be buying players that don’t take us forward ..sounds familiar. What really stood out in the infamous pre West Ham “interview “were the words. ..”I WILL CONTIUE TO INVEST IN THE CLUB . Clearly they HAVEN’T learned.

  • prestondave

    That face that fatty is pulling in the picture makes him look as though he has got male. Jammed right up him.

  • TonnekToon

    foggy Nail on the head , mate. Just Bulls**t PR.

  • Phildene

    And unfortunately some fans will prove them roght

  • magpie9

    Remember “we will punch above our weight”? Has fatty weighed himself lately?

  • Wingpaddock

    This article is 100% bang on the money. There is a report of a Toon supporter who bumped into McClaren in Yarm this morning. The supporter approached and thanked McClaren for his email to which McClaren replied “what email”.
    The beggars are at it again -telling lies -for no justifiable reason. FF need to chase this up on Monday evening.

  • fromtheheed

    From one oldget to another oldgit, I’m quite happy that we have addressed the issue of coach. But with a better looking team than previous 8 years we need to buy quality players.

  • Duke Fame

    Oldgit  I agree, its a good thing. I don’t expect the club to reveal their transfer hand bad happy wait for the targets to get bought.

    I got the email and was quite pleased, also the club gave a £5 discount to ST holders on the sheff utd game, the club are trying, let’s hope  it continues.

  • GToon

    Striving to be prepared for next season? That could mean with the players they have got or it could mean by getting the players we need. We all hope for the latter but expect the former. Love the way they can’t say we are trying to sign players. It’s a shame SM has got his name on this email. Nobody will be impressed by it and it’s just the start of us seeing him as one of that lot who run/ruin our club. If I was given the job of summarizing this email I would have probably just put the word “hello” instead of all that rubbish about wanting to be head coach and getting the right players. At least that wouldn’t wind anybody up. Wonder if he cc’d Ashley in on it.

  • Duke Fame

    Heaton Mick  it will be your membership settings, you need to uncheck the box to agree to receive e-mail promotions, you will then get the next letter.