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Will Graham Carr help Steve McClaren lead Newcastle into mediocrity?

7 years ago

With no manager, sorry ‘head coach’, in place and a managing director who looks like he would be more comfortable holding a stapler than lacing up a pair of Predators. It seems that the majority of the early running in the football decisions made on Barrack Road, will fall to the only senior figure who actually knows anything about football, Graham Carr.

If you only think about players such as Cabaye and the early days of Tiote, then you might say that this is not a bad thing, whereas if you also consider some of the more recent recommendations from our chief scout then you could be forgiven for not having absolute faith.

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Signings/acquisitions such as Riviere and Cabella have done little to enhance the reputation of our once lauded Chief Scout, although it has to be said that Janmaat and Perez seem capable after their first season. Though contrast that again with perennially Injured Siem De Jong, and the decidedly pedestrian Vurnon Anita and you get the picture.

For every high there is a deep low, the average being mediocrity. Surely then it is no surprise that a bloke with such a penchant for the average has allegedly had no hesitation in giving his full support to the candidacy of his good friend Schteve to take over the first team?

Obviously last season’s stumble over the line on the last day of the season has had the effect of setting fan ambitions at an all-time low, with many of us expecting an almost certain dance macabre with relegation from day one of the 2015/16 season.

So the cynic in me has to question whether a season of mediocrity, never close to relegation but never close to seriously challenging for anything, would be greeted like a long lost friend inside the walls of St James’ Park?

Moving that on a stage further, in the eyes of the owner and the board, wouldn’t a season of turmoil like we have just endured be the perfect catalyst to dramatically realign the club’s ambitions, and not necessarily in the positive manner which many seemed to think that owner’s interview alluded to?

If you spent a week buried neck deep in horse manure then to spend the following week only knee deep would be a joyous improvement would it not?

Thankfully it seems that the club employs a specialist in mediocrity, and he now has the task of picking players who could be great, could be dreadful and will undoubtedly average out to be ok at best for the mediocre coach (whom he also had a say on choosing).

To build an average side which will thoroughly ensure no more heart stopping moments of triumph or tragedy for the owner, board, players or fans. To put it another way, the autopilot that nearly caused us to nosedive into the Championship last year has been upgraded to a model that knows only how to maintain altitude, it can’t land (a trophy) or climb (the league).

As a kid I used to wonder just how dull it must be to support Aston Villa or Everton, two teams who seemed to perennially finish around 9th and 10th during my youth, well I guess that we might be about to find out.

If you think about it, to attain the ultimate middle of the league status is the biggest win which the owner could possibly achieve.

We would maximise Premier League placement money with the allowed budget of non-investment, attract no sympathy from outside the region because “you’re doing ok, stop being deluded.”

It would quell fan unrest by removing the threat of relegation and never jeopardise the revenue streams.

Genius really, attainment through lack of effort, based on the footballing judgment of a bloke who used to manage Northampton. Only in the realm of Mad Mike could this become reality.


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