So after John Carver, it looks like the club are destined to appoint Steve McClaren as the new manager, sorry ‘Head Coach’, of what used to be Newcastle United.

Once again proving that Mike Ashley and his board are past masters at snatching defeat from the jaws of victory by passing up on World Cup winner Patrick Vieira, that is if he was even considered in the first place.

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Survival Sunday and the owner’s grand speech of words without meaning seem a long time ago now. That brave new dawn which so many heralded as being about to arrive seems to, once again, have been replaced by the darkest night. Thanks to a regime for whom the most staggering thing about their ineptitude, is that it actually seems to get worse over time.

I wrote several weeks before the end of the season that Newcastle United is heading full steam towards the edge of a cliff, and aside from a half decent performance against a West Ham side who were at least partially on the beach, I have seen absolutely nothing which makes me change that assessment.

Many saw optimism in a statement from the owner which told us absolutely nothing other than his intent to carry on as normal, until he decides not to, with his policy of, “continuing to invest.”

The sane amongst us saw nothing more than a greedy man trying to deflect attention away from the horrors he has perpetrated ,by attempting to hint at a bright future which he has no intention of delivering. The proven liar lies again, surprising right?

The stench of rot and decay from St James’ Park has not lessened, it has got worse.

Firstly, in the classless way in which long serving players, one of whom kept us in the league virtually single-handedly on the last day, have been dispatched via a shared phone call with the coach.

Secondly, in the utterly shambolic way in which the head coach hunt (ha!) has been conducted over a period of no less than six months, resulting it would seem in the imminent appointment of Pardew 2 (electric boogaloo).

The familiar story of a British coach, who had formerly shown some promise and was now seeing their star fade, employed in desperate times by a club who thoroughly match that with their former promise and current slump. A romantic dream of shared redemption quickly being turned into a joint descent further into mediocrity and disdain for all involved, at the whim of a mad miser who couldn’t lie straight in bed.

We are asked to believe that they will sign six quality players based on the generosity of the benevolent owner, news delivered by the club’s selected media partners. Conveniently ignoring the fact that we have already released 6 from an understrength squad, along with 2 more sold on in January – it looks pretty grim for reinforcements.

Whether six players will be brought in is debateable.

Whether they will be of the calibre required is extremely doubtful.

Whether it will be enough to re-energise the squad…an odds on certainty that it won’t, and the answer to the question of whether fans should be looking forward to next season under these conditions is a resounding no.

The comparison between McClaren and Pardew is an appropriate one. Both were highly rated earlier in their career and tipped for big things (although McClaren did actually get a crack at the national job).

Both saw their star dwindle over a number of years, resulting in their dismissal from lower league clubs.

Both out of work at the time of appointment, and both desperate for a credible job with a ‘big club’ to try to seek some personal redemption.

steve mcclaren

The issue of course being that thanks to the now infamous blueprint, the job is anything but credible, instead it is a thankless task of being the only public facing employee of a business with hundreds of thousands of customers in all corners of the world.

A company where every week you have to stand face to face with 50,000 or so of these customers who will let you know in no uncertain terms if you are doing a bad job.

And do a bad job you will, the owner and board will see to that, the blueprint will see to that, the lack of funds, disgust from the terraces, worst injury record in the league, players sold from under your nose and constant negativity caused by all this will see to that.

To become Newcastle United ‘head coach’ under the current regime, with this blueprint in place, is to accept an impossible job where the only reward is cold hard cash, and probably not a great deal of that.

Surely no serious coach or manager would accept these ludicrous conditions, which leaves us choosing what we deserve. A joke of a coach, a clown and court jester in the kingdom of mad King Mike.



  • Sean Kelly

    Let’s get behind him,support the team and everything will be alright. gullible people, gullible and gutless journos aswell. NOWT WILL CHANGE TILL ASHLEY GOES!!!!!! boycott boycott boycott!!!!

  • Sickandtiredstill

    Notts – exactly . I re-post my comment from the Advocaat article:-

    Forget all the hype and media BS. Here’s the only facts that are known.

    1. Pardew leaves, and Charnley said, on January 20th –  “Clearly a number of those (80+ applicants) can be easily discounted but what has been left is a good number of individuals who have different qualities, experience and strengths – some of those are willing and available to come now, others not until the summer.
    The important thing to stress here is that there is a process I have been working through the same as I would if I were looking for any other senior member of staff.
    It’s http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/football/football-news/newcastle-united-not-hurry-name-8404501”

    2. McClaren is approached in January. McClaren is approached in May. McClaren is again approached after being sacked by Derby.

    3. Charnley – “Our overall strategy and structure won’t change – we’re looking for someone who will work within our parameters and will buy into and work with us in terms of what we do and how we operate.
    The traditional English manager who would want full control is not what I’m looking for – they don’t fit within our structure or strategy.”

    I would suggest the obvious here, that there has been only one candidate and he’s the only one who has been in serious consideration, hence the three attempts to get him. Safe to say that Carr was and is behind this choice yet again (widely known to be mates with McClaren).

    McClaren won’t be handed a ‘war chest’ – why? Because Charnley made perfectly clear how it will work.

    “Does he have any say (in transfers)?’ Yes. Does he have the final say? No he doesn’t. There’s a difference there.”

    “You aren’t going to get that now but you will in the summer’, it’s someone who is prepared to say ‘OK’ and trusts us to do that.
    It’s also someone that for example, if we were to get an offer for a player that is at a value that we want to take, isn’t nervous about getting a replacement. There has to be a trust”

    So, a system which even Pardew has criticised is going to remain in place. It’s been so successful after all, hasn’t it? Clearly not, to everyone except the people who want to cling to it.

    Stop inventing scenarios or clinging to hopes that things are going to change for the better. This is how it is and how it’s going to remain and we’ve all been clearly told that. 

    They simply needed to find another person willing to accept this idiotic failure of a system, and 6 months of repeated approaches clearly suggests they did / have – in S McClaren.

  • jack1x

    Same old same old crap , nothing changes a mirror image of last season more people must join the bandwagon of BOYCOTT , if people are happy watching their club stoop to these depths , no ambition , bad boring football , no interest in cup competitions , lie after lie , then they are easily pleased , I for one won’t be back until these clowns are gone

  • Chris Usher

    If he gets the job the toon will gan bck 8yrs not forward u have some geordies saying give him a chance because of his record he had at boro 97 wins in 6yrs ………..aye but they forgot to mention the draws and the 93 he lost Then u have #Newcastle saying they would be interested in bringing Cabaye back but his wages and fee will be a stumbling block if ur not willing to buy decent players ie grafters who want to wear the toon top with pride stop buying 3rd tier players in france then, u have charnley saying he is mystified why the toon hot seat hasn’t been taken even after having 80 applcation’s (Maybe) its Ashleys & Yeself policy saying the coach dosnt have a choice on transfers Football has been going for years and u have these idiots trying to change it to there way sorry muppets but it wont work as past Experience should be telling you to knock it on the head and go back to the Tradition!! will they ever learn a doubt it but a know one thing the only way the Toon will get better is if Ashley packs his bags and sells up.

  • Toonarden

    Well done to that man. One of the best articles I have read for quite some time.
    I often wonder if we are all following/supporting the same team when I see the  “Give him time” fans on blogs meekly accepting the worst Ashley throws at them.
    Yes – give him time like we did with Pardew and Carver – and where did that get us?
    I’d like to give them ALL time – in Strangeways.

  • hettonmag

    Sickandtiredstill Both you and Notts  have  written brilliant posts, will the people who say wait and see and give him a chance, please digest  these posts because this is what NUFC is all about. Keep banging the drum because one day I hope and pray I will see this club rid of the horrible and disgusting regime.

  • KevinBrown11

    Give the bloke time, he hasn’t got the job yet, at least he wears a suit and looks the part, unlike scruffy looking carver, carver stone and the rest of the coaching staff, will have to dance to the tune of the new head coach, he might surprise us all you never know, time will tell,

  • Sickandtiredstill

    KevinBrown11 Why give him time? If he takes the job (will say a lot about him if he does) then he’s accepting a ‘model’ which is a complete failure.
    Thoughts like that just mean you are giving the Ashley/Carr/Charnley plan more time and after 8 years it’s safe and fair to say it doesn’t work.

  • KevinBrown11

    I understand you mate, I won’t go to another game till ashley and his dogs have gone, but is it really mclaren who is the villain ashley wants him and we can’t do a thing about that, it’s out of our hands, until we see him over a ten game run I would hope for the sake of it he gets the support of us, then see how it goes, personally I want the team to be playing good football,
    But I will not set foot in the stadium till ashleys gone,

  • Sickandtiredstill

    KevinBrown11 The support of who? You say you aren’t going back, and I stopped in January – so who do you want to give him any support? 

    I would say McClaren will be a villain if he takes the job under the publicly known restrictions.

  • KevinBrown11

    All the 50 thousand that go every other week, I still want the Toon to win, don’t you? ashley won’t get a penny out of me, others will go and it’s up to the individual to stop going, it’s there right to choose to go or not, I don’t want mclaren as much as the next person but the fans don’t get a say who comes in, and never will while ashleys here,

  • Americanmag

    Remember to cancel your sky package as well if you’re taking boycotting seriously xx

  • Timptoon

    Any manager who is willing to work under Charnley and Carr has already sold their soul. If Ashley meant one word of wanting to win something with Newcastle he has to scrap the blueprint, scrap these two, and bring in a manager who commands and deserves the respect of the players and fans.

  • Americanmag

    Mm probably pretty accurate but then que sera sera Ashley will not do as you ask that’s for sure so either we live with it – or don’t! I’ll judge mclaren by his signings and say after 10 games we should have a good idea of what’s what by then- incidentally there’s a lot of players who have already sold their soul either to their agent or to money or both- which is why Austin for example will probably end up at Spurs- in this dreadful Farce that is premier football fans I’m afraid are pretty powerless and no matter how many boycotts or bedsheets or .coms money talks and Ashley has plenty of it sadly

  • Jarmin Geordie

    “I’ll judge McClaren by his signings”! and which signings do you mean Charnley already stated the coach won’t have final say on any incoming players but like you I’ll give him a chance he can’t possibly be worse than Carver, can he?

  • Jarmin Geordie

    Americanmag “I’ll judge McClaren by his signings” and what signngs may they be Charnley stated the coach wouldn’t have final say on signings, but like you I’ll give him a chance, after all he can’t be any worse than Carver, can he?

  • Sickandtiredstill

    Americanmag Judge him if he takes the job under the conditions we all know of. We’ll know what’s what before the first match starts and the team will likely stay that way until next Summer. 

    As for Austin selling his soul – he’d be absolutely mental to come here instead of another PL club. No matter what commitment anyone may show, if the price is right your out the door as soon as someone offers it.

    Ashley may have plenty money – but he doesn’t spend it on this Club.

  • Demented_Man

    My only hope is that McClaren will turn down the job at the last minute, and leave Charnley with the embarrassment of going back to Geordie John.