I felt the need to come to the defence of John Carver this morning.

He might be the least capable person (against some pretty formidable competition) ever to be put in charge of Newcastle United’s first team but you have to keep a sense of perspective.

(Sam is just one of our ever expanding team of regular/irregular writers, send in your original articles for our website to [email protected] and share them with the world – all views are the author’s own etc etc)

The Newcastle Head Coach attended a charity golf event on Monday and it got a lot of people a bit hot under the collar.

As in…what was our leader doing batting golf balls around when he and the players have a date with relegation only six days later?

As I say, I know he is hopeless and his press conferences are simply an extra embarrassment to what he has overseen on the pitch, BUT what was he supposed to do?

If John Carver had cancelled then I have little doubt that sacking off charities would have been added to his list of ‘crimes’.

It emerged that the players were also having another ‘day off’ on Monday, having also been off work on the Sunday after the latest capitulation on Saturday in West London.

That fact was also met with derision by fans, why weren’t they out there on the training pitch sorting themselves out for West Ham on Sunday etc etc?

Well working on the training pitch hasn’t done them much good for most of the last three years and certainly not the last five months under Carver, so missing a day or two of it is surely neither here nor there.

In fact, why don’t they try something different altogether this week?

Rather than John Carver and his players coming out with the usual ‘we are going to work extra hard on the training pitch this week to put things right…’, which clearly has been a waste of time every time they’ve said it in the past, what about this?

Why not tell the whole squad not to bother coming in all week?

It surely must be worth a try as nothing else has any affect.

Tell them to get their feet up on the sofa and watch Jeremy Kyle, or whatever the French equivalent is.

Have a lie in every morning and then watch crap daytime telly all day before later getting a takeaway and watching some late night Channel 5 film that they know is total rubbish but it is easier to stay slouched on the sofa than be bothered to climb the stairs to go to bed.

Or maybe this is what they have been doing all along…


  • Paul Patterson

    John Carver HAS been unlucky with injuries. But the players who have been suspended, one ‘on purpose’ (John Carver) should hang their heads. Captain Coco and Cisse should’ve been fined for their dismissals. And it’s why I’d get rid of both at the end of the season.

    However, after a good season (2011/12) there is one man who has been at the club throughout slide after slide, rotten run after rotten run, heavy defeat after heavy defeat.

    John Carver (Head Coach)

  • Chemical Dave

    Does anyone actually care about him playing in a charity golf day? Seems like the press made a story out of nowt to me. If we go down on Sunday, oy won’t be because of that, that’s for sure.

  • Toon Magpie

    He is the best manager in the league and that’s all the defence he needs.

  • LeazesEnder

    The Newcastle Head Coach attended a charity golf event on Monday and it got a lot of people a bit hot under the collar…. he was playing with a certain Alan Shearer… 

    …..who during his relegation fight wasn’t seen on the training ground but left it all to Iain Dowie,  maybe we don’t need the Head Coach to be there?….

    ….either way we have a history and track record of doing the same things…. I can’t remember what the results were the last time but I know that Carver has Shearers sympathy.

  • partworntyres

    ‘no christmas for john c, no christmas for john c’……….

  • Sickandtiredstill

    Paul Patterson Football is a multi million quid business. Being unlucky should mean dealing with dodgy decisions etc – not purposefully leaving your squad woefully short of quality players as a whole and particularly without cover for injuries which have been prevalent the whole season. 
    Nowt unlucky about any of it. It’s a case of [email protected]@s poor management and a complete lack of planning from the top, with financial performance placed before sporting ambition.

  • BillytheFish

    Whatever John Carver is, or Isn’t,  I can tell you he is a really decent bloke who has no ego to drive, and believe me if it meant getting results he would run a marathon every day.

    Results speak for themselves, and it is his responsibility to get these players to show they are worthy of the shirt, and he must, and will take responsibility.

    John Carver is not to blame for the poor quality of the team, or the fact that most will already know they have no future at the club, he is however responsible for the way they play and how they set up which from my point of view having seen most of the games live is questionable with the players at his disposal.

  • Corkyjohn

    A really decent, bloke in my eyes, is not someone who will repeatedly tell lies & crawl up the arse of their employer….that is a shitbag

  • Consett Mag

    Give a guy no more than a length of rope and he’ll use it. Some dream to have a ride on! That old Souness tip – “Be careful what you wish for” will live with John Carver for the rest of his days.

    The man does appear to be doing all he can to just get to the end of the season. If he’s doing his bit to deprive Ashley of mega profits for his back pocket, and help drive him out of the club, I feel I would support that action. Cos as long as Ashley is here, we will never be a club of honesty and product.