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Joe (JFK) Kinnear Rewrites Newcastle United History In Astonishing Interview

8 years ago

In the most astonishing rewriting of history, Joe (JFK) Kinnear has claimed that he did ‘exceptionally well’ at Newcastle United!

I certainly didn’t believe what I was hearing but there it was, with the help of the sycophantic Richard Keys and Andy Gray, Joe Kinnear has claimed that but for ill health he would still be at St.James’ Park now and that in his time here he’d helped lay the foundations for the future success.

There is a load of patronising rubbish about Newcastle city centre being full of two hundred thousand penguins (fans in black & white shirts) and stating as fact that even the women go to work in Newcastle United shirts(?!!!), plus a lot of rubbish about unfair treatment form the fans and ‘cockney mafia’ blah blah blah. Naturally Keys and Gray are grunting along in agreement.

The man who sold Charlie ‘Insomnia’ and made Newcastle United a laughing stock with his foul mouthed rants and ludicrous public statements, said the following in an interview on TalkSport – I nearly choked when I read Keys’ ridiculous opening line;

Richard Keys

“I’m sure that Geordie fans would like to say ‘well done’, you didn’t get quite the credit you deserved for laying the foundations for sorting that mess out”.

Joe (JFK) Kinnnear

“As you say, if it wasn’t for ill health I honestly believe that I would still be there now, I went in at a difficult time when we were third bottom. After I sorted a lot of the problems out… the problem was that Mike Ashley was trying to sell the club, I realised we needed extra players, as they have done today, but I never had the opportunity to do that so I had to work with what we had, even though it was a half decent side.

I thought I was doing exceptionally well, we got up to twelfth place then went up to West Brom and I had my second heart attack”.

Obviously it is rude to let the truth get in the way of such a good ‘story’ but I think it is our public duty.

Amongst the ‘facts’ JFK gets wrong is that Newcastle were actually 19th in the table and not 18th when he took over, then heading into that West Brom match NUFC were 15th and not 12th. Plus of course he misses the fact that we may not technically have been in the bottom three when he took ill but we were only above it by the skin of our teeth.

In the 21 matches Kinnear was in charge, Newcastle only won 4 matches and before he took ill United had only taken 2 points out of the last 18. He was laying foundations alright, only problem was that we were moving into a house in the Championship!

Yes I often think (in nightmares), if only we still had Joe Kinnear, where would we be…!


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