We now have the final proof that the press think they can link any player with any club.

With Alex Ferguson reportedly not impressed with Wayne Rooney these days, certainly in terms of attitude, there are claims he could leave Manchester United for Real Madrid, Barcelona or…Newcastle!

Although hang on, maybe this daft story that emirates247.com are running could have some truth with Wayne Rooney willing to give up the Champions League, guaranteed trophies and easy access to the Lowry Hotel….

While Mike Ashley is suddenly prepared to pay £50m for a single player and give him more wages than the rest of the Newcastle squad added together.

I suppose one good thing is that unlike Michael Owen, Rooney clearly doesn’t care one bit for England so that is one distraction our new signing wouldn’t have.

Next thing you know he’ll have signed & converted to Islam and be observing Ramadan with Demba Ba and Papiss Cisse.

It is a crazy plan that might just work, though I don’t think Graham Carr would be claiming much credit for finding him.