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Latest Contender For Worst Ever NUFC Transfer Speculation

9 years ago

The transfer speculation surrounding Newcastle United this Summer has been about as uplifting as the weather, plus we are now faced with possibly the worst ‘story’ so far…

The following nonsense has been doing the rounds;

Turkish newspaper, Akşam reported Pardew as saying, “Barcelona want Cabaye, obviously it will be hard to keep hold of him, however, if he goes we have alternatives.

“I was impressed by the player who scored against us [Baroni], we’ll look into it and depending on the situation could put in an offer.

I give you three/four possible scenarios –

Firstly, it is totally made up.

Secondly, it has been largely lost in translation and maybe Alan Pardew did talk to them but his cockney/Geordie accent meant that when he asked where the toilet was, they got a little confused and thought he said that Cabaye was probably leaving and a bloke who he’d only seen playing for the first time tonight was suddenly his top transfer target.

Thirdly, they saw the Blue Peter programme that showed you how to make a transfer speculation story using string, sticky tape and half a dozen toilet roll   cardboard bits.

In other words, take one old Pardew throwaway line about Yohan Cabaye speculation, add a few carefully chosen words, then carefully insert a Turkish based player who is of interest to your readership and shake well.

Finally, it is all true.

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