Taking a short break from jumping up and down on innocent people’s cars in Newcastle city centre, the sunderland captain has unfortunately(?) appeared to have fallen off one of them and banged his head, speaking to the mackem echo

“Newcastle are up there in and around the Champions League places and it gives us something to aim for.

We are not far short of them, to be honest. In the games we have played against them, I think we have been stronger than Newcastle, but we will see what happens next season.

We have got great support, a brilliant manager in Martin O’Neill and we are a massive club.

The boss has so much experience and I think if you look around all the other top clubs in the Premier League, Sunderland are right up there.

Outside the top four, we are as big as anyone and that is where we need to be in the future”.

Lee Cattermole was also heard to mutter that sunderland is a really nice place to live (though obviously he has no intention of doing so) and he flies in and out of sunderland airport every day.

  • Sharpie

    As an aside, did any Twitter users see some of the comments from mackems after last night’s game? A selection include: “Cisse’s alright but I’d rather have Bendtner and Ji-Dong” “He didn’t mean it, he was aiming for Row Z” “That was a cross.” 

    How can Cattermole say they’re not far behind us? They’ve only played one half of even semi-decent football against us in two seasons in the game back in March and the fact that they played ok in that first half was put into sharp focus by how poor we were in that first half where all of our players seemed to have lost their heads and were playing the occasion, not the game. Once Sessegnon went off, they were asking to be beaten and only Ba’s poor penalty stopped them from being so. 

  • Tone Army

    Delusional, just like the empty heeded fools who follow his shower of shite..

  • Waynekennedy

    Santa and the Easter bunny live next door.He like timderland are a. Joke unless he is talking of newcastle ladies

  • Mike

    Sunderland are the 6th most successful team in top flight history, Newcastle are 7th. Both (historically) are big clubs.

    • Anon

      what? if the fairs cup is not taken into account then neither is anything pre prem era in terms of league football, the stats on that one are newcastle 6th scumderland 34th hahaha 34th..

    • Markyedgar

      “They’ve got 23,000 empty seats……Sunderland is a massive club
      “They’ve got 42 players no-one knows….Sunderland is a massive club
      “Adults for a fiver and kids for free….Sunderland is a massive club
      “They’ve got Steve Cram celebrity fan….Sunderland is a massive club”

    • Paul Soulsby

      based on what , titles won ?, so Huddersfield are as big as Leeds, Spurs and Man City then ?, lets talk Third Division football and significantly more football outside the top flight

  • Jonnyad

    Altough it pains me to say it Newcastle have played decent football this season..more than decent. But it’s typical of you lot to get on your high horse when the going is good. It wasnt that long ago when Newcastle fans were slightly reserved and humble because they had a couple of years where their club look like it might be going down the drain, now we’re back to the pissing competition of mines bigger than yours. The fact is SAFC & NUFC arent that different in terms of stature. NUFC edge it in terms of attendance and branding but thats down to past premier league performances. SAFC have had years of instability but we’re in a good position to crack on and improve. Of course we’ll always hate each other but for gods sake just let the performance of the team do the talking and keep the greifing for derby days. NUFC is the top North East club at the moment but just remember you fall harder from a greater hight, so enjoy what you’ve achieved but do it with some class please.

    • themagonline

      Well he started it….

      • Jonnyad

        Started what?

        • Juniorchubbs

          being a dozy mackem. get back on your own teams websites. why do fans of other teams come on here? mind your own business jizzlicker.

    • ivan marx

      It cuts both ways, doesn’t it? What about the ‘North East top dogs’ award (1999-2001 & 2008-2011) that so very mysteriously seems to have gone missing this season? Also 5under1and fans are just as prone to revel in NUFC’s misfortune as the other way round – the scenes after the last game at the stadium of plight in 08/09, and the game there between the two clubs that same season, being a case in point.
       The difference is that 5under1and’s misfortunes have been more frequent and their opportunities to revel in our demise less so. I would agree that football fans in general should show more class, but that’s not going to happen, is it? Banter is part and parcel of the culture and it will always go OTT sometimes.
      IMHO, 5under1and fans are way more likely to go OTT in this way. For example, I have heard and read numerous examples of mackems claiming, in all seriousness, that the Fairs Cup competition in 1968/69 (exactly the same format as the UEFA cup until 1997 and the same qualification criteria as the UEFA until the late seventies) doesn’t count as a European Trophy because it was a ‘trade fair competition’ played between two clubs from two cities European cities, by invitation only.
      ‘Fairs Cup Denial’, I believe it is called… an offence which carries heavy penalties in many European countries, but there again, how many 5under1and fans will ever visit them?

      • Jonnyad

        Unlike N9wcast1e fans we dont need football as an excuse to travel abroad and broaden our horizons. You’ve just demonstrated everything I hate about N9wcast1e. Cocky arrogance that will undoubtedly come back to bite you in the backside. You’ll never learn to be gracious in victory thats why there’s so many people waiting to tear strips off you when you fail.

        • Markyedgar

          Choose cheesy chips & panda pop, choose no airport, choose your tourist attraction being a centre for glass, choose the ripper hoaxer, choose 2 home derby wins in 32 years, choose having webbed feet and six toesd,choose less games & goals in Europe than Shola, choose being relegated with record low points…..TWICE, choose SMB, choose 5under1and, not me I Chose the geordies, Choose Newcastle United.

        • ivan marx

          Answer the question, then, instead of just repeating what you already said earlier: What about the ‘North East Top Dogs’ award that loads of mackems were crowing about this time last season???
           
           “Cocky arrogance”, as I said before, cuts both ways, so you can’t just have it that Mags are being arrogant when we finish higher, but mackems aren’t when they do, just because your ‘higher placing’ invariably goes unrecognised by UEFA.
           
          People go to games and support football teams in the hope of success, and like it or not, in this day & age, qualification for Europe by virtue league position counts as success. Fans that have supported their team, in far higher than average numbers, when the chips have been down for a good number of years are entitled to celebrate and if you don’t like that it proves beyond argument that you have a chip on your shoulder.
           
          Another gem that came out of Wearside when NUFC averaged close to 40,000 for our first ten games of 2009/10 in the Champoinship – several thousand up on 5under1and’s average for their corresponding fixtures during a promising start in the Prem –  was that “the Mags were only doing it to p!ss of sunderland.” You couldn’t make it up! You are obsessed with us the the point of being a stalker and your presence on here proves it.

        • Paul Soulsby

          9 – 1  over a  century ago and the Toon finished the season as League Chmpions and knocked SAFC outof  the cup in a reply at Roker to boot, as long as yer happy though

    • Paul Soulsby

      Till the spectre of Financial Fair Play hoves in to view then  jamrag garden ain’t so rosy, enjoy !

    • LDBOL

      No one is on their high horse, the original article was about a sunderland players aspirations in the premier league. Saying that you have got to take what he says with a pinch of salt as he is the type of person to run across your car and cause criminal damage which is not the norm here on the North side.

      Newcastle and Sunderland are miles apart as for a start Newcastle is a real city with historical Cathederal and modern airport, Sunderland is and has not. Also, the 2 football clubs have seen some changes over the year but what has not changed is the relentless support of the toon army.

      Newcastle is and allways will be the place to be in the north east.

  • Juniorchubbs

    i’ve always known he is an inbred feckless brain dead halfwit. now he’s proving it in the cheysey chip wrapper.

    • Jonnyad

      And some one who calls themselves Juniorchubbs doesnt project an image of redneck inbred stupidity?

      • Juniorchubbs

        and you are a retard.

        • Juniorchubbs

          anything else you would like to add clever mackem?

  • bean

     If a Newcastle player were to come out and say we want to aim to be as good as Sunderland, he would not be able to play in a black and white shirt again. This just proves the case that Sunderland would be happy finishing 5th bottom as long as Newcastle were 4th bottom.
      Also, 20 points isn’t anything like close.
    Any Sunderland fan defending those comments needs to take a good look at what they see as achievement/progress.

    • Jonnyad

      What does being successful come down to? Scoring goals at the right time and keeping them out. You’ve only scored 11 goals more than us this season and conceded 3 more but as you rightly say you’s are streets ahead of us when it comes to points. Who’s to say where we might have been if we’d had a decent striker who could have scored 10+? It’s all conjecture but the truth is NUFC arent streets ahead of SAFC when it comes to ability. Also we had the disadvantage of having agent Bruce at the start of the season. Do get me wrong I no saying you’s dont deserve your glory, but dont get too carried away.

      • Juniorchubbs

        yawn. get back to the pennywell.

        • Jonnyad

          Go and fill your fat boots with curry in Arthurs Hill fat boy!!!

          • Jonnyad

            FAT

          • Juniorchubbs

            ha ha. INBRED.

      • Tone Army

        I also noticed the 7 goals that seperates our fortunes but it is not a “congecture of truth” to say newcastle are streets aheah of sadfc, it is a fact, the seven goal thing is just a statistic, we are where we are because we have cosistent quality throughout the team/squad;) 19 of those goal;s against came in 3 poor performances! you have performed pororly for most of the season whereas we have played champs league form footy all season, those are the facts.

        • Jonnyad

          OK I guess we agree to disagree. I hope for your sake that Ashley puts his hand in his pocket in the summer cos you’s have alot of games to get through and if your squad isnt up to it you’s will find it tough to keep momentum across all competitions.

      • bean

        I think you mis-understood. We have been crap for years and there’s a good chance that next season we could be crap again. The fact that Sunderland just want to be crap +1 is what makes me laugh

      • Paul Soulsby

        oh yeah ?, ability wise, where’ SAFC’s Ben Arfa ?,Cisse ?, Cabaye ?, Tiote ? Coloccini ?, Ba ?, Krul ?, we have a nucleus of players that could hold their own in  any team in the Premiership, which Sundertland players can yer say that about daft lad ?

      • MikeNE3

        So “Agent Bruce” was the reason the wearysiders fell short of a realistic challenge this season? Are you sure about that? The gap between sunderland and Newcastle has actually grown under the lying leprechaun’s stewardship, your discipline has dropped and after a honeymoon period you have been very mediocre to say the least.

        If media reports are true and O’Neill will be required to sell before he can try and add talent to your distinctly average squad it may be safc who have the summer to fear, whilst NUFC prepare for continental competition.

  • Jarra

    where does he live then.

    • Steve

      The Toon!

  • Steve

    This old joke (which is actually true and not funny) springs to mind ….
    What have Toon fans and s*nlun fans got in common?
    Their obsession with The Toon!

  • Jarra

    What where the two mackems doing in the City centre jumping on peoples cars.

    Are they going to be punished.  A fne would be stupid, bearing in mind what they  earn.

    A goal term of at least 14 years would suffice.

  • Chris

    They can’t help themselves can they? As usual they cannot talk about their own team they have got to talk aout us, listen to any phone in and every Mackem caller cannot get through a conversation without mentioning NUFC. Still their well balanced a chip on both shoulders

  • Big Paul

    what a plank!

  • Big Paul

    Prattermole that is

  • Paul Soulsby

    “Stronger” = dirtier. Is he including the 5 – 1 rape ?, as big as anyone outside the top 4 ?, Liverpool included ?, fecking ASBO jakey scrote’s hitting the white cider a bit early mind.

  • Beefy

    Interesting explanation about why you havent done so well Johnny lad, ( the agent bruce thing ) i await your with baited breath to see how you explain the previous quarter century like 

  • arran0211

    As a member of a (mildly football disfunctional) family of 3 Geordies and 3 Mackems (yes – we live(d) in the same house – Jarrow has a lot to answer for!!! – gotta admit that Jonnyad makes some decent points. Nobody is on top for ever and everybody has their moments. Keep the rivalry going but to get malicious is just f**king stupid. My 9 year old stepson asked why he got spat on because he was wearing a black and white shirt. 

  • arran0211

    As an extra comment – I was pleased to see my Mum, sister  and brother ecstatic when Sunderland won the cup! Hated that it wasnt us at Wembley but we had a magic party afterwards!

  • Juniorchubbs

    MACKEMS.

    JUST FUCK OFF YOU FUCKING PEADOS.

    • Juniorchubbs

      a bit grumpy this morning so sorry for the insult generalising mackems as peados. i know theyre not all peados, but do fuck off.

  • Crawfordladd17

    Big as Newcastle, Chelsea, Everton, Liverpool, Aston Villa? Haha your having a laugh your team is a pile of average crap Meyler, Bridge, Bardsley, Turner, Kilgallon, Campbell, Wickham, Ji, Vaughan, Bramble, Mignolet, Kyrgiakos and Elmohamady 
    But tbf Sessegnon, McLean, Larsson, Gordon, Westwood and Gardner are good, Richardson, O’Shea, Richardson, Colback, Brown and sometimes Bendtner aren’t bad, half decent. Yea everyone in the Summer Sunderland to get top 7, with these signings, but some how we were going down with top signings like Ba, Cabaye, Marveaux(maybe) and Santon (not including Cisse because he arrived in January, not the summer). Obertan was the only poor signing, with Larsson, and McLean the only good for them, while Abeid is only 19/20 and Elliot hasn’t really played yet.

  • adolsky

    how is this man still captain of 5under1land at any top club he would lost his job after the court case shows how far 5under1and have sunk

  • Abelard

    Sunderland are a bunch of doggy-paddling strugglers at best.

    Getting rid of Catterwaul might actually improve things.

  • Laurawalpert

    Sunderland European fixtures out for next season……………….

    Swansea away!!