Football, eh? What a load of crap. The fact that this team of Newcastle United underachievers managed to demolish one of next season’s Champions League competitors when it was already too late, seems to be the punchline in a long unfunny joke.
Perhaps it is a Michael McIntyre one…
So, after years of flirting drunkenly with it, relegation has finally put its arms around Newcastle’s collar. We deserve it.
While almost every other team has adapted to the ever-changing demands of the top division, the magpies have been stalled by complacency and arrogance. Not because of the fans, of course, but due to chronic mismanagement inside the boardroom and the training ground.
Yet, as better writers have already said, Newcastle United shall never be defeated.
Indeed, silver linings are already gleaming in the summer light over Leazes Park.
There is good football to be had in the second tier and plenty of interesting locations to be visited. The last two times St James Park has hosted a team outside the top league it has arguably seen some better football than these past couple of years in the Prem.
In this league good football is generally rewarded (as Middlesbrough recently showed), unlike games against Tony Pulis’ brand of drudgery.
Also, hopefully a few more relatable lads on the team sheet will give the club some integrity, rather than those guilty souls who seemingly look down upon the rest of us from a crumbling pedestal.
It would be brilliant if Adam Armstrong could be brought into the team with the same success as Andy Carroll in 2010. Nor will it do any harm to players like Dummett and Lascelles who need to continue learning some fundamental lessons.
The obvious cynical response would be to say that nothing will change with the current regime still in place. That is probably true. Wastrels will still lurk in the periphery of the squad, our wage bill will look ludicrous in the club’s dwellings and we will continue to be patronised by callous press releases.
Well, to be anything but chaotic is not Newcastle’s style.
So long as this group of supporters keep their dignity though, as they did so brilliantly during the Spurs game, there will always be a silver lining for those of us in black and white.