John Carver has rather bizarrely claimed that no matter what has been promised before and never happened, he is adamant that Mike Ashley will properly invest in the Newcastle squad this summer.

The Newcastle Head Coach has said once again that he has seen the exciting plans for the summer and we won’t believe what we are going to see etc etc

However, Carver now wants to claim ignorance of what has happened in the past and has stated ‘Whether they’ve said it in previous summers and it hasn’t happened I don’t know’.

So in all of those years standing alongside, sitting alongside, Alan Pardew, the departed manager’s former assistant now claims he has no idea of what happened in the past.

A big big reason why so many Newcastle fans were sick of Alan Pardew, was because of the shameless things he said to cover up for Mike Ashley. Making promise after promise of investment in players and we wouldn’t believe how good things were going to be if we just had a little patience…then he left.

Which brings us to John Carver…

Telling us we won’t believe what’s going to happen next, the players we are going to buy etc etc…

Being John Carver at the minute must be a bit like being the unfunniest comedian in the world or a dodgy MP.

Nobody laughing at your jokes every time you put on a performance and/or nobody believing a word that comes out of your mouth.

Never mind cash for quotes, more like quotes in desperation for a job.

John Carver:

“They (Mike Ashley/Newcastle United) need to invest in the summer and they have said they’re going to invest.”

“Whether they have said it in previous summers and it hasn’t happened I don’t know.”

I’m a fan as well you know:

“What I am saying is they have said it to me and I am adamant that they are going to invest.

“I have seen the plans and they are encouraging, not for me as John Carver the head coach, but for John Carver – the fan inside me.”

This is a big summer you know:

“They know, the club know, they have to invest in the team because you can only keep going for so long, they have to invest in the team and I have had assurances they’re going to.

“This is the biggest summer in the club’s recent history, definitely. We know that and everybody else knows that. We have to get it right but let me tell you… Lee (Charnley), Mike (Ashley), they all know that, we have got to get it right.”

Threatening the top teams…:

“We can threaten the top teams, we are not going to win the Premier League but if we invest right then why can’t we go after the European spots, the Champions League spots?

“Why not? Look at Southampton, they lost so many players last summer and had to replace them but they have done a great job this year.”